Where's Doctor Doolittle when you need him?

Posted on Fri Feb 22nd, 2019 @ 3:13am by Major Jacob Asher & Civillian Shae

Mission: A Brand New Day
Location: Conference Room/ Infirmary
Timeline: Continued from 'Yet Another Effing Debrief'

"Okay," Nathan said. "It's settled then. Jake will lead a team to escort Doctor Andrews, Salara, and, if she's willing to join, Shae. Doctor Andrews, you and Salara get together with Jake and decide when the best time to leave will be and what equipment, armaments, and clothing the team will need. Okay, everyone. Dismissed."

At the dismissal, Jeremy stood to allow the senior officers to leave, as was protocol. Plus, he wanted to at least check on the other woman, the "Shae". He'd seen some twitching and her color was shifting. At the very least, if she needed it, he could escort her to the infirmary.

“I don’t-” Shae gasped out, trying to say something, only to be cut off by a gasp of pain as the churning of her gut grew worse. She gripped the edge of the table so tightly that her nails began to change into claws, gouging deep grooves into the wood. When she began to growl and pale fur began covering any exposed skin, it was a clear sign that something was happening to her.

"What the HECK is that!" Jeremy shouted backing up as the changes started, his voice squeaking and high and eyes wide enough to show the whites all around. His heart leapt into his throat and there was a good chance his bladder let loose. "Is that one of the goulds?" he shouted, looking around the room at the others, "Do we kill it?"

Whatever it was, it was obviously dangerous and...he backed up, hitting a chair as he did so. But, as the woman continued to turn into some kind of alien monster, he grabbed the chair and raised it. He was told they were supposed to go armed on the base, but he still needed his final qualification before he got to carry full time and how the ECH EE DOUBLE HOCKYSTICKS was he supposed to protect anyone without a firearm! The chair may not be lethal, but if you bludgeoned anything enough in the head, it eventually died.

The two SFs outside the door heard the growling and came in. When they saw Shae changing, then drew their sidearms.

Jake and Hassan and Tony all rose to their feet when Shae started to change. When Jake saw the SFs draw their weapons he reacted.

Jeremy raised the chair above his head as much as he could and was prepared to bring it smashing down on the monster's head when -

"Stand down!" he ordered, but the SFs didn't listen. Before Jake could say anything else, Jamal and Tony had disarmed the two SFs.

"The man said stand down," Jamal said. "So you're going to stand down."

Jeremy dropped the chair on the ground in front of him, backing up and raising his hands. He'd heard his Major's orders and was going to comply, even if it cost him his life. Which is what it seemed like it would do. The creature kept possessing the poor little girl and was growling and clawing. "Standing down," he said to the two other members of the team, hoping to keep his bones unbroken on his first day. But...that wouldn't matter if the werewolf ripped his throat out.

Shae felt hot and prickly all over and her racing heartbeat was all she could hear. When the sudden urge to remove her clothing overcame her, she staggered back, pushing her chair back with a snarl. By the time she unzipped her jumpsuit and pulled the black t-shirt underneath over her head, there was very little about her that could be recognized as ‘human’. She fell forward onto her hands which were now paws, and within a matter of seconds a giant white fox was crawling out of the jumpsuit and boots, then promptly heaved a brown puddle of half-digested chocolate onto the floor.

Jake had been watching, fascinated by the whole process. Well, I've thought you were a fox from the start. This wasn't what I had in mind but I'll be damned if it isn't cool as Hell! Jake thought when the transformation was complete.

With the chocolatey contents of her stomach now emptied onto the floor, the great white fox hung her head in embarrassment shame at what she had done, and though she initially felt some relief, she was still in distress and uttered a soft whine as she lay down on the cold floor.

"Oh my god, she ate almost all the Hersheys bars I had delivered to my quarters." Jessica felt for her.

"Give it more if it's going to kill it!" Jeremy said. Why weren't they killing the monster? "Major?" he asked, but his words were falling on uninterested ears apparently.

Jake slowly went over to Shae and very slowly started to pet her. "There now. You're okay. I'm guessing you can't deal with chocolate any better than a Golden Retriever. Let's keep that in mind everyone, okay? Don't offer her any food a dog can't eat. Corvus, I think we've got a veterinarian on staff to looked after the SF's working dogs and help the zoologist with any strange fauna we run into off world. Track her down and have her meet us in the infirmary just in case Shae can't or won't shift back. Okay, Shae, I'm going to pick you up, alright?"

Shae's intelligence and comprehension was not affected by her form, so she could understand him just fine. Except for Golden Retriever, she had no idea what that was, or a veterinarian or a zoologist, but she understood enough to know that Jake was just trying to help, even when he asked to pick her up. Shae managed a weak nod to show that she understood.

When Shae didn't seem to complain, Jake gently picked her up, made sure she was secure and turned to the door. He looked at Nathan, who waved the SF's away. They left after Jamal and Tony handed them back their guns. When Jake left the room carrying Shae, the two sergeants lead the way out to clear lookie loos and gawkers on the way.

Shae remained limp in his arms the entire time, too out of it to feel embarrassed at being seen this way. It was humiliating that this was the first impression she had made on the Tau'ri, but there was little she could do about it now, done was done and she would just have to worry about it later.

"Shae, I'm really sorry about this." Jessica noted.

"Doctor," Nathan said. "She'll be fine. Jake will get her to the infirmary, Corvus will find the vet and bring her to the Infirmary to treat Shae. You should go and start preparing for tomorrow. I'm assuming Shae isn't going anywhere today, so whatever we're going to do, it will have to be tomorrow."

Nathan moved to leave then paused when the archaeologist didn't move. "Jessica? Go get some rest and prepare for tomorrow. That's an order."

"Yes, sir," Jeremy said, sure he knew exactly where the vet was at the moment. He ran out of the room and around Major Asher with a curt "by your leave sir" as he did so.

The shouts preceded them and continued as Jeremy kicked open the door and entered. A woman was in a fireman's carry across his shoulders, her free hand repeatedly smashing into Jeremy's chest while her flailing leg kept trying to kick. "PUT ME DOWN!" she screamed again with a lot more venom and invectives thrown in for good measure. Jeremy went to the Major and dumped the vet at his feet. "Sir, the vet as you ordered."

The Vet made it to her feet. "You damned bastard! He kidnapped me! I told him I would come when I was finished with what I was doing and he assaulted me! ASSAULTED ME! I want to file a report!"

"Of course, Doctor," Jake said, who still had the vulpine version of Shae in his arms. "If you'd like I'll personally take him out behind the stargate and kick his ass. But until then, could you please treat our friend here? The short version is that she apparently has a human...humanoid? She can look like a human woman, and while she was in that form, someone gave her chocolate, quite a bit of it. It seems that even when she's in her female human form, she still has the same reactions to foods that she would in this form. So she got sick, changed, and puked, and from the way she looks, if she didn't have this gorgeous fur, she'd be very green around the gills. It looks to be that in this form, she's basically a fox. A fox is an animal. You're an animal doctor. So treat her and then we can talk about the nice Staff Sergeant who got a little overzealous following my orders."

"I'm not one of your mindless robots that you can just-" she started, but before she could finish the sentence, she was confronted by six foot two, muscled airman.

"You..." Jeremy said, looking down for an indication of rank or authority and found...nothing. "You...civilian," and the way he said the word in the moment would've made the General blush, "were given an order by the Major and you will comply with his orders or something very bad will happen to you. VERY bad! And I don't know what that is because I've NEVER seen anyone not follow the Major's orders!" He stepped forward as he spoke, driving the vet back and toward the exam table. "And if you think I assaulted you before imagine what will happen when I begin to BATTER you!"

He stopped as she was pressed up against the table. "Do your duty now!" She was bent over, with him still leaning forward, not yelling but still forceful.

"Wha...." she asked, sidestepping and positioning herself between the Security Force airmen. They had guns and could protect her. "What's the problem?"

"I just told you what the problem was, Doctor," Jake said. "Now, like the overenthusiastic PJ just said, do your duty. Please."

The vet cast a glance at Jeremy, who stood, doing his best impression to glare visciously at her, arms crossed over his chest. Though he tried, his 'viscious' look was just a little too much like any child about to throw a tantrum due to his unfortunate 'baby face'. But, he was willing to assault and kidnap her on the orders of that martinette major so who knew what else he would do. She was inside a mountain on a military base and anything could happen to her and it would be covered up completely. She knew she shouldn't have taken this job but...she had student loans to repay and the government promised a nice bonus.

"This appears to be a cross between a red fox and a fennic fox," she started, looking down at the animal, "but the coloring is wrong for either species and the claws appear fully retractable, not semi. However," she said as she smacked one of the Security Force airmen on the arm, "give me that stethoscope" she said absently, "there appears to be enough similarities to believe that theobromine poisoning might be as grave a concern for this species as for any ordinary terrestrial species. Not that you idiot, the stethoscope!"

"Are you sure we shouldn't just kill it?" Jeremy whispered to the Major, "this is one of those alien monsters you told me about, right?"

"No, dumbass, it's not," Jake said. "The Goa'uld are like snakes. Then burrow into the back of your head, wrap themselves around your spine and your brain stem, and take over your body, and locking you away inside of it forever. They regenerate your body so they can live in it a really, really long time, and each time they regenerate a little more of what makes you, you, dies. That," Jake said as he pointed to Shae. "Is our ally. The snakes are the enemy." Well, not all of them you nimrod, but I'll let Jessica and Salara tell you about that themselves. Jake thought.

"Yes, sir," Jeremy answered, head bowed and muted. Maybe he wasn't cut out for this after all. If he couldn't even begin to understand friend from foe.

"Well?" the vet said, glaring at them. "Does anybody know?"

"Know what?" Jeremy asked, wanting to be distracted from proving he wasn't as good as they thought and he'd be sent...probably to Antarctica or some place where he couldn't ever tell anyone about this command. Didn't Bellows mention something about imprisoning people on other planets with dysfunctional return gates?

"How much chocolate she ate? That is very important you know! These two zombies only know which way to point their guns."

"Yes, Doctor," Jeremy said, as he moved forward, removing his uniform blouse. "Theobromine toxicity can be fatal to canines depending on the amount consumed, but, unfortunately the only two he seemed to know how much were the patient and her friend, neither of which is here to tell us right now."

"Of course not, that would be too simple, have the person who stuffed a dog full of poison actually come to answer questions!" The vet turned to look around the room and stopped as Jeremy closed the cabinet, dropping several items on the table next to Shae. He handed a container to the vet.

"Activated charcoal," he said as he moved to the end of the table.

"Yes, exactly," the vet said, frowning slightly. "You also have the funnel?" She nodded, though, seeing that he did.

"Okay, I'm sorry ma'am," he said to the fox, "this going to be uncomfortable and maybe hurt a little, but it'll save your life. And I swear, if you bite me you'd better have had your rabies shot or I'm going to become very British, very quickly." He picked up the metal tube and brought it close to Shae's muzzle.

Shae was quite out of it, barely able to understand what the boy of a man was saying to her, so of course it was only natural for her to resist what he was doing, feeble though that attempt may be, but she did not bite, she was not some wild animal without any sense!

After the tube was inserted and the charcoal, in it's thick liquid form, was dropped down, Jeremy quickly removed the tubing and let Shae's head turn to the side, to keep her from aspirating. Then, he took hold of her paw and began shaving the top. "I've never inserted on an animal before," Jeremy said looking at the vet who was guiding him through the procedures.

Shae offered a distress whimper seconds before she started to heave again, sending most of the vile substance they had forced down her throat to come right back up along with more chocolate. She was shaking now, not a seizure but rather a fine twitching tremble from the toxic chocolate working its way through her system.

"That's okay, I'll insert, please prepare the bag."

"Yes, Doctor," Jeremy said, "what flow rate?"

"Assume a weight of about 11 lbs, maybe more, and standard dehydration, we'll go for about 160ml per hour."

"Yes, Doctor," Jeremy said, pulling out the IV tubing and manipulating the flow adjuster on the bag. The vet indicated she had inserted the IV needle and Jeremy quickly attached the IV tubing before performing a backflow. A small amount of blood filled the tube then, as it mixed with the saline solution, it was reabsorbed.

"What about toxic effects, Doctor?" Jeremy asked.

"We'll monitor for seizures, but I don't want to medicate until we know how similar her biological chemistry is to Earth foxes."

"Yes, Doctor," Jeremy said as he began writing everything they'd done and could remember on a scrap paper, so he'd have accurate notes to prep her chart.

Shae was breathing heavily from exhaustion, but it was not overly labored and each breath that followed grew steadier. She was still trembling, but that would subside once her body metabolized all the theobromine she had absorbed. For now she just wanted to close her eyes and forget this day ever happened.

Jake saw how miserable Shae was and found a place to stand where he wasn't in the way but that he could place a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"She'll need to stay for observation, but the vomiting stops, no seizures or other conditions present, she'll be fine to be released in the morning," the vet said. "Finish here?" he asked Jeremy, who only nodded as he avoided trying to get the Major's attention. Showing his incompetence once was enough.

"Good, then if there's no other plans to assault me, I do have other work to finish up," the vet said, rounding on the Major. "Unless your goons are still bored and need to attack someone?"

Jessica sighed as she bore witness to the back and forth. 'I wonder if we will succeed in saving this galaxy.'

*Jessica, it's too soon. They may yet pull together enough to save this world.*

'I pray to god they will.'

"Sergeant Corvus," Jake said. "Damn good work. Keep it up. I'm glad you're on my team. Doctor Andrews, maybe you can catch Jeremiah here up on the subject of the Goa'uld so he doesn't make any diplomatic faux pas."

Jake turned to the vet. "Thank you, Doctor. You did good work. If it's not too much trouble, please send over one of your vet techs to monitor her condition while she's resting in this form. Everyone else, go rest up and prepare. I assume once Shae is on her feet and feeling better, we're headed to Shang Ti's last known location. I'll stay here with her until she wakes up.That's all. If you don't work in the infirmary, scoot. Shoo. Unass this area RFN already."